心灵之美,闪亮呈现

时间:2022-05-02 10:21:50

大连工业大学职业技术学院 编译 刘克

若问何为美丽,人人自有其解。但在我看来,心灵之美远胜过外表之美。正所谓“人不是因为美丽而可爱,而是因为可爱而美丽”。品读此文,相信你会有更深刻的体会。

It was 4 o’clock in the morning on June 9, 2003, when I received the phone call parents dread.

“This is the emergency room calling and your son was just brought in with severe burns on his face, neck, and arms. We have called for an airlift and are going to fly him to the burn unit in Seattle.”

Seattle was 350 miles from his college, so we knew immediately this was serious.

The physician described the accident, which caused the burns. At 2 a.m., our son and his friends decided to barbecue hamburgers in the courtyard of their apartment complex. Not exactly the dinner hour for you and me, but for college students, probably fairly normal. While they were cooking, an automatic sprinkler system came on, dousing the grill. They dragged the wet grill to another location and attempted to relight it. Doing what most adults know not to do, they squirted lighter fluid directly on the smoldering coals. The grill literally exploded, and, as it ignited, the flames caught my son’s shirt tail. With his clothes ablaze, the flames shot from his waist to well over his head.

Fortunately, one of the boys was quick witted, grabbed my son, and rolled him into the sprinkler system. While it saved his life, it was not in time to save him from severe burns and the associated terrible scars.

After he recovered from the intense treatments, the doctors told him they would not do plastic surgery for 6 months because it takes that long for the skin to stop shrinking and wrinkling. So, he had to return to college with scars typical of severe burns.

When I was a child, my mother told my sister, who had a 10-inch, very visible and nasty scar on her arm, “Nancy, if you ignore the scar, other people will ignore it. It does not mean they will not notice it, because they will. But, it means it will not matter to them if it doesn’t matter to you.”

I passed this wisdom on to my son.

“Keaton, no one will pay any more attention to your scars than you do. If they do not bother you, they will not bother others.” He took my advice to heart and returned to school with his head held high―glad he was alive.

By the end of the six-month waiting period, he decided that the scars did not matter and did not define who he was. So he made the decision to forgo any plastic surgery.

We all have scars and flaws that we believe cause people to shun us. And we spend a lot of time thinking that if only we looked differently, or dressed differently, or could have more money, or a different and newer car, people would like us better.

But you see, like Keaton’s scars, people will only judge you by your looks, or your clothes, or your car, if you are judging yourself by these same false standards.

One of my friends in college was as ugly as homemade sin and yet, when people met him, they noticed his looks for about 10 seconds. This man felt good about himself as a person and spent most of his time concerned about other people’s comfort and welfare. It never seemed to occur to him he would be rejected because of his looks―and he wasn’t.

What people saw was his kindness, his concern for them, and his sense of humor. They never noticed his looks because he set the standard himself. He didn’t act “ugly”, so people didn’t treat him as “ugly”.

What about your scars and flaws? Do you let them define who you are? Do you really believe that other people care about what is only on the surface? Or are you able to look beneath your skin and see the beautiful person residing within?

Today, put your imperfections out of your mind and concentrate on what you value within yourself. Because if you can see that beautiful person, everyone you come in contact with will see the same beauty.

Let your beauty shine through.

2003年6月9日凌晨4时,我接到一个令父母们为之恐惧的电话。

“这里是急救室,你的儿子由于面部、颈部和上肢严重烧伤刚刚被送到这里。我们已经要了飞机,准备将他空运至西雅图烧伤中心进行治疗。”

西雅图距我儿子就读的大学有350英里之遥,因此我们马上意识到情况十分严重。

医生向我描述了导致烧伤的事故经过。凌晨2时许,我的儿子和他的朋友们决定在综合公寓楼的院子里烤汉堡。虽然对你我来说,那并非是晚餐时间,不过对大学生们来说,却实属正常,正当他们烧烤之时,自动喷淋系统启动,浇熄了他们的烤肉架。于是他们把淋湿的烤肉架挪到了另一个地方,并试图重新点燃。虽然大多数成年人都知道不该这么做,但他们还是把打火机液直接喷到焖烧的木炭上。在点燃的瞬间,烤肉架旋即爆燃,窜出的火苗烧着了我儿子衬衫的下摆。随着衣服的燃烧,火焰迅速从他的腰部窜到了头顶。

万幸的是,一位男同学反应很快,一把抓住我的儿子,把他推到自动喷淋系统下面。虽然保住了性命,但他还是没有逃过严重的烧伤,而且留下了可怕的疤痕。

经过许多特别治疗,他康复出院。医生告诉他,因为皮肤需要长时间才能停止收缩起皱,因此,6个月后才能给他做整形手术。所以,他不得不带着严重的烧伤留下的疤痕返校上学。

我记得在我小时候,我妹妹的胳膊上有一道10英寸长、很显眼、令人厌恶的疤痕。我母亲告诉她:“南希,如果你对此淡然处之,那么别人也会毫不介意。这并不意味着他们对此视而不见,因为他们确实能看到。但是只要你觉得那不算什么,他们也不会大惊小怪。”

我也把这些激励的话语灌输给我的儿子。

“基顿,没有人比你自己更在意那些疤痕。如果它们没有烦扰你,那就更不会烦扰他人。”他牢记我的忠告,高昂着头返回了学校,他很高兴,他还活着。

6个月的等待期结束时,他断定那些疤痕不算什么,也没有限定他的人生发展。于是他决定不再做整形手术。

我们坚信,每个人都有令人讨厌的疤痕和瑕疵。但是我们总是在花费大量时间思考,要是外表能与众不同,穿着标新立异,或者能够更加富有,拥有一辆更新的轿车,人们就会更加喜欢我们。

但是你要知道,就像基顿身上的疤痕,如果你用这些错误的标准来评价自己,那么人们也会仅凭你的外表、你的服饰以及你的爱车来评判你。

我大学时的一个朋友奇丑无比,不过人们每每遇到他,都不会对他的外貌过分关注。这位男士自我感觉很不错。绝大多数时间致力于他人的安逸与幸福。看来似乎他从未因其外表丑陋而受人排斥,而事实上也的确如此。

人们看到的只是他的善良、对他人的关爱以及幽默感。之所以人们从不看重他的外貌,是因为他为自己设定了审美标准。他行事不丑,因此人们就不待之以丑。

那么又如何来对待你的疤痕和瑕疵呢?它们限定你的人生发展了吗?你真的相信人们只关注那些表面上的东西吗?你有能力透视体表,看到深藏于内心的美丽心灵吗?

如今,你应抛却思维中的片面之见,而应关注内心最看重之事。因为如果你能看到心灵之美,那么与你交往之人也能看到心灵之美。

那么就让你的心灵之美闪亮呈现吧!

(责编:张楚武)

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