温、良、恭、俭、让

选自于：《论语・学而》

解读：人要学会温和、善良、恭谨、简朴、谦让。即：做人一定要有美好的德行。其实这正也是自古以来的做人之本。

《论语》有载：子禽问于子贡曰：“夫子至于是邦也，必闻其政，求之与？抑与之与？”子贡曰：“夫子温、良、恭、俭、让以得之。夫子之求之也，其诸异乎人之求之与？”

大意是说，子禽很好奇老师每到一个地方，人们一定会将当地的治政得失告诉他。因孔子谈起一个地方的治理方法，总是非常明白，了如指掌。子贡说：“老师就是以温、良、恭、俭、让的德行与人相处相谈，人们自然会告诉他那些事情的本始。所以，如果认为老师是去求得通达了解的话，那么这种“求”可不是一般人所认为的那种“求”。他是自己修养圣明而自然了知，就像一块纯净而雕琢精美的玉，呈现于人们面前，同时具有全息记载人事的一切功能一样。大成儒家历来直指做事的核心和元始，就是做人。以做人为基，“志于道、据于德、依于仁、游于艺”，是非常完美的思想和行为锤炼系统，而温、良、恭、俭、让五德，不是在表面上做作，而是真实修养自然呈现的德行。

据传，孔子6岁时的一天，和隔壁的小朋友一起玩“礼容”的游戏。孔子扮演相国，而那个小朋友扮演国君。

阳光照在孔子的脸上，但表情却很严肃，一本正经地对着同伴鞠躬。忽然“国君”从位置上跳了起来，指着孔子的背后笑了起来。他正想说话，孔子抬起头来，严厉地瞪了他一眼说：“国君怎么可以在祭祀的时候不守礼节，随便离座呢？并且还嘻嘻哈哈的，成何体统！”“国君”却也不管他，仍在笑着说：“好怪的一个人呐。”孔子正待再说什么，却感到一双手放在了自己的肩上。他不禁回过头去。 就在他回过头的瞬间，孔子看到了一个长相奇特、衣服非常破烂的人。孔子当即小脸一呆，但马上又镇定下来，抚着那人的头说：“叔叔，你一定走了很远的路吧？不然你的头发怎么这么乱呢？你一定是从蛮夷地区过来的，不然你怎么会这么穷困呢？”那人微微一笑，说道：“小朋友，你叫什么名字？”孔子不答话，却反问道：“叔叔，你还没有回答我的问题呢，这是不合礼节的。”那人当即一愣，转而一笑回答说：“叔叔确实走了很远的路，但并不是从蛮夷地区来的，叔叔这么贫困只是因为叔叔不会理财罢了。好了，叔叔已经回答了你的问题，你说你的名字吧。”

孔子这才说：“我叫孔丘。今年6岁。”那人说：“你们刚才在玩什么呢？”孔子露出了笑容，“礼容。还是我妈妈教的呢，可好玩了。”同伴在一旁嘟囔了一句：“才不好玩呢，要不是他比我高，打不赢他，我才不玩这个呢；还不如捉迷藏好玩。”那人听了说：“好，你回家吧，今天不玩了。”同伴欢呼了一声，跑了。那人接着问孔子：“孔丘，你喜欢这个游戏吗？跟叔叔说说原因好吗？现在基本上没有小朋友愿意玩这种游戏呀!”孔子板起脸来，说道：“这‘礼’是文王制订的，应该好好学习，这明明很好玩嘛，可他们就是不喜欢。”说完孔子噘起了小嘴。

那人冷笑一声，大声说道：“什么文王，全是骗人的鬼话；小孩子鸟事不懂，在这里装模作样，实在可恶！”这时，正逢孔子母亲走过，只听母亲说道：“这位先生贵姓？为何当街作此等模样，吓唬小孩子？”这时那人对孔子母亲行了个礼，说：“夫人您好！这位应该是令郎吧？我看他虽是儿童，在玩耍时却有一种雍容的气度，所以多说了几句。请问夫人，令郎玩的游戏是您教他的吗？”孔子的母亲微微一笑，说：“正是我教的。”那人说道：“小子姓李名耳，又名老聃，刚才出言冒犯，请夫人原谅。小子虽然不才，对周礼却略知一二，愿意为令郎做指引；夫人虽是大贤，恐怕对周礼还不如小子知道的多。”孔子的母亲禁不住露出了笑容，说：“那就有劳李先生了。”

7天之后，孔子因为有老师指点，学得很快，整天乐呵呵很兴奋的样子。孔子的母亲看了很高兴，李耳也对他赞不绝口，原本丑陋阴沉的脸也渐渐有了光彩。

后来人们也知道，李耳即是中国古代伟大的哲学家和思想家、道家学派创始人老子。

老子在孔子家呆了6个月，一直教孔子学“礼”。最后，老子留书信一封，告别了孔子母子二人：“孔夫人：令郎孔子，师从本人李耳，时逾半载，其艺已成；近日李耳有事在身，不敢请辞，请夫人见谅。”然后有礼而去。

Cordial, Frank, Courteous, Temperate, Deferential

In Book Ⅰ of The Analects, Zi Qin said to Zigong, “When our Master arrives in a fresh country he always manages to find out about its policy. Does he do this by asking questions, or do people tell him of their own accord?” Zigong said, “Our Master gets things by being cordial, frank, courteous, temperate, deferential. That is our Master’s way of enquiring―a very different style, certainly, from the way in which enquiries are generally made.”

Legend has it that when he was six years old, Confucius played the “rite” game with a neighboring child. Confucius played the role of Prime Minister and the other child played the role of King. At that time, a man in shabby clothes with a peculiar face came up to them and asked: “Kids, what are your names?” Confucius replied: “My name is Kong Qiu. I’m six years old.” That man asked: “What are you playing?” Confucius said with a smile: “Rites. My mom taught me. It’s great fun.”

Confucius’ mother happened to pass by. She asked the man: “What’s your name, sir?” The man saluted her and said: “Hello, madam! Is this your son? Although he is a child, he displays an elegant attitude in the game. So I asked him some questions. Did you teach him the game?” Confucius’ mother smiled gently and said: “Yes, I did.” The man said: “I am Li Er, also named Lao Dan. I am sorry to disturb you. Though I am not talented, I know something about rites of the Zhou Dynasty. So I would like to instruct your son. Despite your being very knowledgeable, madam, I am afraid you do not know as much about the rites of Zhou Dynasty as I do.

At that time, Confucius’ mother was worrying about how to find a good teacher for Confucius. So he was very pleased at the offer from Li Er and said in great joy: “Thank you, Mr. Li.”

Thanks to the instruction from his teacher, Confucius made rapid progress in one week. Seeing him happy every day, his mother was also very happy. Li Er also praised Confucius very much. Li Er, in fact, was Lao Zi, a great ancient philosopher and thinker and founder of Taoism in China. Lao Zi stayed at Confucius’ home for six months to teach him the rites.