我们和公牛有个“约会”

As an only child growing up in suburban Atlanta in the late 1950's and early 60's， I loved visiting my cousin in northern Georgia. Linda lived on a farm and was my best friend―the sister I never had.

The summer Linda turned sixteen I was still fifteen. She was allowed to date， but I （not having reached that magical age） would have to wait until December.

That seemed eons1） away， so we dreamed up a way to double date. After everyone was asleep， we'd sneak out of the house and meet two local boys Linda knew. Later， we'd sneak back in. Great plan！

We congratulated ourselves on our ingenuity2）. On the appointed night， we retired early， which should have been an immediate tip-off3） to Aunt Mary Nell. We were wearing good clothes under our nightgowns. We lay sweating on our beds until Mama Sewell and Aunt Mary Nell were sound asleep.

At her signal， I raised Linda's bedroom window for her to climb through. She tore her new Capri's and used a swearword. Fortunately， Aunt Mary Nell's rhythmic snoring reassured us that all was still well.

We sneaked to the gate separating the property from an adjoining farm owned by our Uncle Roy and Aunt Margaret. Linda lifted the latch4） and stepped through.

Swatting5） at an insect circling my head， I let the gate slam against the fence post with a thunderous crash. Straining our eyes against the darkness， we were relieved not to see any house lights come on.

Just at that moment we heard a rumbling in the bushes. Someone or something brushed6） past us. Something very large with wiry7） hair and hot breath！

Then the awful truth hit. "Oh， no！ Horatio is out！" gasped Linda. "We've got to put him back."

We chased Uncle Roy's prize bull in the moonlight. Linda yelled， "Catch his head！ Hold him！" But there was no way that I―a city girl―was going to grab that bull's head.

As we ran， we prayed. Uncle Roy would never forgive us if anything happened to Horatio―he was the best bull in the county.

Finally realizing we'd never catch him， Linda suggested we call Aunt Margaret.

"She'll help us corral8） him， and she won't squeal9） either. Aunt Margaret's a friend."

"No，" I protested. "We can't tell anyone. My dad will kill me if he gets wind of10） this. I'll never be able to visit you again." We exchanged breathless protests until finally we agreed for Linda to sneak back inside and telephone Aunt Margaret. Luckily， Aunt Margaret was still up and alone. When she arrived， she left her truck lights on， pointing them in our general direction. Cautiously she approached Horatio.

Suddenly Horatio bolted11） and she grabbed his tail as he went by. Aunt Margaret isn't a small woman， but that old bull dragged her around the yard like a rag doll. She was screaming at the top of her lungs， so all the house lights quickly came on.

We were in for it12） now！ I figured my folks would come for me first thing in the morning. I might as well just start packing. Meanwhile， Aunt Margaret's ride continued， through briars13） and bushes， across ploughed fields and over the lawn. Her firm grip held.

Then， unexpectedly Uncle Roy showed up carrying a little silver whistle. He blew it. Amazingly Horatio stopped dead. He lowered a massive head and trotted up to Uncle Roy like a pet retriever.

After prying14） Aunt Margaret's ten-finger death grip off Horatio's tail， Uncle Roy led him back through the gate and into the barn. Meanwhile， we helped Aunt Margaret inside picking twigs and beggar-lice off her clothes. While Mama Sewell got her a glass of water， we managed to deposit her in the recliner15）. Obviously， we never made it to our date rendezvous16） point. Incredibly， my parents never found out about this episode. The question of how Linda and I happened to be outside was never raised. Everyone assumed we'd heard Horatio rumbling around and tried to put him up ourselves. They never questioned that we were wearing our "good" clothes.

For days afterward， we giggled at how funny Aunt Margaret looked holding onto Horatio's tail. We also marveled at Horatio's obedience to Uncle Roy's whistle. Forty years later， Linda and I laugh about our "double date" with Bull Horatio.

我是家里的独生女，50年代末60年代初在亚特兰大市郊长大，那时我特别喜欢去佐治亚州北部看望我的表姐琳达。她住在一个农场里，是我最好的朋友，就像我的亲姐姐一样。

琳达满16岁的那年夏天，我还只有15岁。她可以约会了，但我（因为还没到那个有魔力的年龄）还得等到那年的12月才行。

12月似乎有好几万年那么遥远，所以我们想出了一个办法，准备来一个四人约会。等大家都睡着了之后，我们就从房子里偷偷溜出去，和琳达认识的两个当地男孩约会。然后，我们再偷偷溜回家。这计划真不错！

我们为自己的聪明才智感到得意。到了约定的那天晚上，我们早早地就上床睡觉了，这应该给玛丽・内尔姨妈传达了一条即时信息――该睡觉了。我们都在睡衣里面穿着漂亮的衣服，躺在床上浑身直冒汗，直到休厄尔大妈和玛丽・内尔姨妈睡熟了才起来。

在琳达的示意下，我抬起她卧室的窗户，好让她从这里爬出去。她一把扯掉身上那件新的卡普里睡衣，还冒了一句脏话。幸运的是，玛丽・内尔姨妈那有节奏的鼾声让我们很放心：一切依旧正常。

我们悄悄地溜到琳达家农场的大门口，门的另一边是罗伊叔叔和玛格丽特婶婶的农场。琳达打开门闩，迈了过去。

我因为抬手去拍一只在我头顶上盘旋的虫子，结果让大门砰地一下撞在了栅栏柱上，发出了巨大的响声。我们瞪大眼睛使劲盯着那一片黑暗，没看见有任何一个房间亮灯，这才松了一口气。

就在那时，我们听到灌木丛中传来隆隆的声音。有什么人或东西与我们擦身而过。那个东西体型巨大，毛发坚硬粗糙，而且还呼着热气！

紧接着我们突然意识到了一个可怕的事实。“噢，不！霍雷肖跑出来了！”琳达倒抽了一口气说，“我们必须把它赶回去。”

我们追着罗伊叔叔这头宝贝得不得了的公牛在月色下狂奔。琳达喊道：“抓住它的头！拉住它！”但让我――一个从城里来的女孩――抓住那头公牛的头，那是完全不可能的。

我们一边奔跑，一边祈祷。如果霍雷肖发生什么意外，罗伊叔叔永远都不会原谅我们的，它可是全县最好的公牛。

最后，琳达意识到我们俩人永远也抓不到它，于是建议我们给玛格丽特婶婶打电话。

“她会帮我们把它赶回畜栏里，而且她也不会告发我们。玛格丽特婶婶是自己人。”

“不行，”我抗议说，“我们不能告诉任何人。要是我爸听说这件事，他会杀了我的。那我就永远不能再来看你了。”我们上气不接下气地争论了几句，最后达成了一致意见：琳达偷偷溜回屋里给玛格丽特婶婶打电话。幸运的是，玛格丽特婶婶还没睡，而且她身边没别人。她赶到之后，没有关掉卡车的车灯，让两道光柱冲着我们的大概方向照过来。然后她小心翼翼地向霍雷肖靠近。

突然，霍雷肖狂奔起来，玛格丽特婶婶在它经过身边时一把抓住了它的尾巴。玛格丽特婶婶个子不小，但那头老公牛拽着她绕着围栏跑，就像拽着个破布娃娃似的。她扯着嗓门大声尖叫着，于是所有房间的灯很快都亮了。

现在我们铁定要挨罚了！我估计我爸妈一大早就会来接我了。我不如立马开始收拾东西吧。与此同时，玛格丽特婶婶的“拽牛之旅”还在继续着，他们穿过荆棘和灌木丛，越过刚耕犁过的田地，再从草坪上冲过。她一直紧紧地抓着牛尾巴不松手。

这时，罗伊叔叔突然出现了，他吹响了手里拿着的一只银色小哨。令人吃惊的是，霍雷肖突然就停了下来。它垂下硕大的脑袋，像一只宠物猎犬一样快步小跑到了罗伊叔叔的身边。

玛格丽特婶婶的十根手指还死死地抓着霍雷肖的尾巴，罗伊叔叔掰开婶婶的手指，然后牵着霍雷肖往回走，穿过大门走进牛圈。在这期间，我们一边扶着玛格丽特婶婶回屋，一边摘下她衣服上的小树枝和草籽。休厄尔大妈给她倒了一杯水，我们想办法把她扶到了躺椅上。显然，我们根本没去成约会会合的地方。令人难以置信的是，我爸妈从没弄清楚这件事。关于琳达和我怎么碰巧就在屋外这个问题根本没人提起。大家都想当然地认为，我们听见了霍雷肖在附近隆隆的声响后试图自己把它赶回牛圈去。他们也从来没有询问过我们当时为什么穿着那些“漂亮”的衣服。

接下来的好多天里，我们谈起玛格丽特婶婶拽着霍雷肖尾巴时那滑稽的样子就咯咯直笑。霍雷肖听到罗伊叔叔的哨声后那听话、顺从的样子也让我们啧啧称奇。40年后，说起我们与公牛霍雷肖的“四人约会”，琳达和我都会开怀大笑。

1. eon [?i??n] n. 极漫长的时期；万古

2. ingenuity [??nd???nju??ti] n. （设计、安排、行动的）巧妙；足智多谋

3. tip-off： （预先透露的）消息

4. latch [l?t?] n. 门闩

5. swat [sw?t] vt. 重拍；猛击

6. brush [br??] vi. 轻触；擦过

7. wiry [?wa??ri] adj. 金属丝般坚硬的

8. corral [k??r?l] vt. 把（牛、马）关进（或赶入）畜栏

9. squeal [skwi?l] vi. 告密，告发

10. get wind of： 获悉有关……的消息；听到……的风声

11. bolt [b??lt] vi. （因受惊吓）突然快跑

12. be in for it： 难免受罚；势必倒霉

译 / 张玲